Healthcare IT Donuts

This post was originally featured on HIStalk.

There’s a famous Internet meme that explains each of the major social media networks through donuts.  

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In light of National Health IT week, I thought it would be fun to look at the healthcare IT space through the donut hole:

EHR Companies

Epic: I make the most expensive donuts, I choose who I sell donuts to, and I don’t let my customers share donuts with anyone else.

Cerner: I make donuts using 85 different kinds of donut machines, but tell people it’s one big masterfully planned donut factory.

Meditech: I make donuts using a 1980s donut machine.

McKesson: I just threw out my old donut factory, and since the new one isn’t doing too well, I’m looking for a new donut factory to buy.

Siemens: I designed and manufactured every piece of equipment in my donut factory, even though most of those components are available as off-the-shelf commodities.

NextGen: I make literally every flavor of donut in existence, and none are particularly good; I wonder why I struggle to sell donuts.

GE: I make donuts, burgers, seafood, Indian food, Chinese food, and Italian food and sell them all at the same store.

Athena: I give donuts away for free, but charge people for actually eating them.

Greenway: I used to sell donuts by the dozen, but now I force people to buy a 12-month subscription to buy one donut per month.

Allscripts: I make donuts, then announce donut recalls.

eClinicalWorks: I don’t publicly talk about my donut business, but I sell lots of donuts anyway.

Practice Fusion: I give out donuts for free, and show weight-loss ads throughout the donut shop.

Startups

HealthTap: I provide a social network for people to share tips about the best and worse donut shops.

Catalyze: I help people build donut shops faster.

Pristine: I take pictures and videos of donuts and share them via Google Glass.

ePatientFinder: I match patients to weight loss clinics based on how many donuts they’ve eaten.

Simplee: I make it easier to pay for donuts.

Teladoc: / Ringadoc: I help people eat donuts over Skype.

RunKeeper: I ask people to record how many donuts they’ve eaten.

JawBone / FitBit: I automatically track how many donuts people eat using highly inaccurate algorithms.

MaxWell Health: I help people make sense of donut nutritional facts.

Kai Nexus: I provide tools to manage process improvement in donut manufacturing.

AdhereTech: I remind people to eat donuts on time.

CenterX: I make it easier and cheaper for doctors to prescribe donuts to their patients.

Ovuline: I remind women when they should eat donuts.

Miscellaneous

Merge: I like sharing pictures of donuts with all of my friends.

Mirth: I give away donuts for free, then charge customers when they ask how to open the donut box.

Medicity: I used to sell lean donuts, but now promise that my donuts aren’t influenced by my transfat parent company.

Orion: I sell kiwi donuts to most of Canada.

AirStrip: I provide solutions to watch and monitor donut-producing equipment.

ZocDoc: I help donut customers find donut shops.

WebMD / iTriage: I help people learn about different kinds of donuts.

Consulting Firms: I teach people how to eat donuts.

Every HIE: my customers promised me that they’d pay for donuts, but didn’t.

HIStalk: I write about all things donut.